No because who told me to gain 22 pounds back -_-.

I literally couldn’t believe the scale when I stepped on. I was last 237 in August. Stepped on the scale last week in January and I was 255 pounds. Like I can’t even fathom how I got here. My heaviest weight was 269 in 2022. I remember promising myself I would never gain that weight back and yet here I am knocking on its door.

Truthfully I believe it was just all the stress from my new job but also happy relationship weigh as well. Either way I have to get back on track. I feel like I’ve done this song and dance too many times to count and it feel so tiring to feel like I am almost starting over. I went from being close to my first goal of getting down to 200 pounds now I am futher away.

I’m not giving up but I am disappointed in myself. And that’s okay. Its okay to not be okay. Being health is my main goal but I would also like to like how I look as well. Honestly having a Significant other who loves me as I am is a plus but it doesn’t mean I will stay as I am to appease them either. He’s supportive either way tho. If he was then to the curb he goes!

Anyways, getting back focused is kinda tough because I was to go at it in a way I can consistently keep up with so I am less likely to fall off again. Usually, buying proportioned meals helps out like frozen protein dinners, meal cups, etc. I want to be able to have meals on hand because lately I don’t be in the mood to cook anything. When I first started my 2022 journey I was cooking a lot. I also was limiting my fast food intake as well. I need to start their again. You have wayyyyyy more control over home cooked meal than fast food. But hey fast food is NOT the enemy. Lack of self-control is! There are a few people on social media who helped me to realize that there are ways to pick healthier options at my favorite fast food placed while also looking weight. Obvious, you can go at your journey how ever you want. What I learned what worked best for me was to swap my bread options with low carb dupes/swaps.

For example, instead of my usually bread I would use the Sara Lee Delightful bread instead. Regular tortillas swapped out with Mission Carb Smart or Zero Carb tortillas. Other things I would do was measure and weigh my food but after time I fell off with that. IDK specifically what it is that led to my lack of wanting to do anything cooking wise. I used to love cooking my meals. I guess it started feeling more like a chore instead of something enjoyable.

Hopefully, I can shake whatever this is that has me so unmotivated. I will start praying over it and let God lead me on my journey again. If I don’t know anything else, I know the Lord Jesus Christ will never fail me.

“I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me” Philippians 4:13